Well, gentlemen, it looks like the party is over. Less than two months after Donald Trump took his seat in the White House, Europe is already packing its bags to leave the toxic relationship with the United States. The scene on 28 February, when Volodymyr Zelenskyy arrived in Washington with his hand outstretched, was not a cheque for billions, but a slap on the wrist with Trump’s trademark “Make America Great Again” smile. Bravo, the transatlantic friendship has been officially declared dead. The coffin can be ordered.
European leaders, who have slept under the warm blanket of American security for decades, have suddenly woken up to the fact that Uncle Sam no longer wants to play knight on a white aircraft carrier. NATO? Frozen, like Russian assets in European banks. Brussels is facing a dilemma: either continue to whine and wait for Trump to change his mind, or finally pull itself together and build something of its own. Spoiler alert: the latter sounds like a fantasy, but let’s take a look.
How America abandoned Europe (and not for the first time)
The United States used to be the cool big brother who would always get you out of a fight. But Trump seems to have decided that Europe is just a neighbour who always asks to borrow a lawnmower but never returns it. Withdrawal from NATO? Easy, he’s already threatening it. Reducing troops in Europe? Who needs these bases when you can spend money on new golf carts for Mar-a-Lago! And the funniest thing is his flirtation with Putin. While Russia is swinging tanks in Ukraine, Trump seems ready to make the deal of the century with the Kremlin. Apparently, he is dreaming of a joint Trump-Vodka brand.
Europe is, of course, in shock. A decade of the American umbrella and now you’re sitting naked in the rain of Russian missiles. Well, it’s time to grow up, isn’t it?
European Plan B: We’ll survive without you, Uncle Sam
So what will Europe do now that its main security sponsor has stepped down? Here are some ideas that are already buzzing in the corridors of Brussels:
European Defence Union
Yes, the good old dream of having our own army. Let’s call it the European Defence Community (EDC) to make it sound pretentious. Imagine French tanks, German drones and Italian generals arguing over whose pasta sauce is better. Will anything good come of it? We’ll see.
Ukraine without the United States
Europe has decided that if America dumps Zelenskyy, we will pick him up. Germany is already hinting that it may give away its Taurus, and the frozen Russian billions may be spent on tanks and reconstruction. Generous, but will we have the guts?
Industrial boom (well, let’s try)
In order not to lose to Russia, China, or even the United States, Brussels wants its own European Armaments Bank. More debt, more factories, more weapons. It sounds like a plan, but won’t it end up as another bureaucratic monster?
Veto cancellation
Oh, this is going to be fun! Imagine how Poland or Hungary will scream when their veto is consigned to the dustbin of history. But without it, Europe will remain a club where everyone talks at the same time and no one listens.
An independent Europe: a dream or a joke?
Can Europe become a major geopolitical player without the US? So far, it looks like a teenager who ran away from home but forgot his wallet. Russia is already cutting its teeth, China is winking from around the corner, and Trump is probably laughing his head off. A break with Washington is not just a “goodbye”, it is a painful blow to the wallet, the army and the ego.
But you know what? If Europe doesn’t do something, it will remain just a nice open-air museum with croissants, the Eiffel Tower and Russian Iskanders on the horizon. So, fellow Europeans, pull yourself together. Or at least pretend you can.
By Marianna Nyzhnia
6 March
